The Photo I Didn’t Want to Take (And Why I’m So Glad I Did)
Sometimes the photos we don’t want to take end up being the ones we treasure most. This is your reminder to exist in photos—messy hair, baby weight, and all. One day you’ll be grateful you did.
I did not want to take this photo.
I was in the studio frantically getting my youngest sons 6 month photos- probably several months behind.
I wasn't planning on being in them.
My oldest was there as well and at the end he said "Mom, you get in there too, let's get one of the 3 of us"
Every self conscious cell in my body revolted.
I absolutely did not want to get in a photo.
I wanted to say no. I wanted to tell him that I looked like a hot mess, that I didn't have in the right clothes, or my hair wasn't right, or that I didn't have makeup on, or that I was still carrying too much baby weight. More simply put I wanted to tell him that I wasn't good enough right now to take a picture with them.
But then I had a thought - little eyes are watching and little ears are listening. Who was I to give them a laundry list of reasons their mother isn't good enough to be in a photo? Especially reasons they don't even see. Also deep down I knew that even though in that moment I was being quite unkind to myself that one day I would look back and see myself in a different way. If anything my experience has taught me time changes the way we see photos, and the way we see ourselves.
So I did it, hopefully not flinching enough at his question that he would notice. I set the timer on my camera and hopped in with my boys. Hot mess and all.
That's now been almost 5 years ago. This photo eventually got printed and sets on a little shelf in my bathroom. I see it every day. And every single day I am thankful it exists. Im thankful that in that moment when given the chance I chose to get in the photo. Because I was right. I now love this so much. I see little boys that aren't as little anymore, a baby where my 5 year old is now, and me with chubby cheeks and messy hair - instead of that laundry list of reasons I had to not get in the photo, I now see the laundry list of reasons that I absolutely should.
Just your friendly reminder to exist in photos.
If you need some help I'm here to help make it easy.
If you’ve been waiting for the “perfect” moment, maybe this is it.
